Japanese Onsen

An onsen is a Japanese hot spring and bathing facility. As a volcanically active country, Japan has thousands of onsens scattered throughout all of its major islands. When we first moved to Japan I was so very excited about these hot springs, that is, until my husband told me that you don't wear clothes. I am a pretty open person but have some body image issues which have kept me out of the onsens for two and a half years. A few weeks ago I reserved a private onsen where it was just myself, my husband and our daughter. So many people kept telling me that I had to go and in there would be no judgment at the onsens. This past weekend I needed to relax and be alone so I left Nellie with Cesar and took myself to an onsen. I had no idea what I was doing but figured I would just wing it. I was given a towel and a smaller towel and sent into a dressing room area. There were baskets for clothing and belongings. After I took off my clothes I wrapped myself in a towel and walked into the bathing area. I quickly realized that there was no place to put my towel and I was to take the smaller (modesty) towel in the bathing area. There were several bathing stations available and without staring I looked at the other women to follow their lead. After bathing I went into the hottest onsen 42 degrees Celsius which is about 107 degrees Fahrenheit. There were large windows looking out to the outdoor portion of the onsen. After I got too hot I took myself to the outdoor portion. This is where the magic happened. It was absolutely beautiful. There was a waterfall surrounded by tall trees and lanterns in the skyline. I was alone out there and did a lot of pondering. First, I felt so empowered that I overcame my body image issues and had this experience. I felt a sense of empowerment and connection to my female self. I thought about the name I was given when I interned at Anasazi, the name "she the calm through the storm". The individuals who named me referred to "She" being a feminine quality of knowing who I am as a woman and not being afraid to be that strong woman. As I pondered about this I realized I have felt quite lost for some time and it was nice to feel empowered as a woman and to get back in touch with my feminine self. As I was taking this all in, I was practicing deep breathing and listening to the sounds of nature. While the waterfall was hitting the ground and the birds were chirping the cool breeze hit my face as I sat naked on the rocks below covered in hot natural mineral water. I felt a sense of connectedness with mother nature and thought about Eve in the garden of Eden where I imagine there was no body shame and being one with the earth was exactly what happened on a daily basis. I thought about all of the beauty that God has provided us and how lucky I am to be in a place where I can enjoy such beauty and experience such a calming peace. Onsens now have such a different meaning to me, they are no longer just a place where people bathe and are naked together in a hot tub, they are a place to reconnect with oneself and ones spiritual being. I have included a picture I found online of the Onsen I went to. For obvious reasons, no pictures were allowed in the onsen.